Dear Etta Kitt
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What should I wear when I go out dancing?
Excellent question. Dancing has its own culture, so when you join a group of dancers and enjoy their company and want to be accepted, it is a good idea to dress as they do.
The more formal the dance, the more formal the outfit. On the other hand, at a dance lesson, there is no need to dress formally. I'm happy to explain Black Tie, Semi-Formal, and Dressy Casual.
Black Tie: Gentlemen wear black tuxedo coat, trousers, cummerbund and bow tie. (The "tie" can be any color and match the cummerbund. For the lady: A ball gown or evening dress with a full skirt.
Formal: Gentlemen wear a suit and tie (or sports jacket) and ladies wear a cocktail gown or evening dress.
Semi-Formal: Gentlemen in dress slacks with dress shirt and tie, jacket is optional. Other options include a vest or a sweater that shows the tie. Ladies wear an evening dress, dinner dress or flowing pants outfit.
Dressy Casual: When associated with a special
event, some form of decorum and good taste should prevail. A dress for her and a nice pair of slacks and shirt for him are informal, but respectful. Ladies have a wide set of options. Dressy casual offers a conservative dance appearance.
If in doubt, follow the crowd. See what others do and follow suit or call someone and ask, "What are you wearing or how do you plan to dress?"
It is important to wear clothing that makes it easy and enjoyable to dance.
*Avoid baggy sleeves as hands may get caught in the sleeves.
*Be careful wearing accessories that can catch your partners' clothing and scratch or bruise.
*Men, if you have no place to stash your keys or loose change, put them in your LEFT pants pocket to avoid discomforting your partner.
*Ladies, if you perspire heavily, void sleeveless shirts and strapped dresses o avoid contact with damp skin.
*Put long hair up or in a pony tail. It is ore pleasant for your partner when doing urns.
*Wear dance shoes rather than sneakers orsandals which can cause ankle injuries during turns.
Etta
Dear Etta Kitt
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Do you think it is appropriate for a lady to ask a guy for a dance?
Excellent question. For the answer, let's ask the guys.
· Why not, the idea is to have a good time!
· Sometimes, men let their insecurities get in the way. Sometimes, the man ends up on the opposite side of the dance floor and has trouble getting to you. Help us out. Most of us will be happy that you asked.
· My understanding, and from what I have observed in most social situations locally, is that it is most acceptable for a lady to ask a man to dance. From the practical side, most dances seem to have fewer men than women. If you are a single woman at a dance, then you need to ask or you may be waiting a long time to get a dance in.
· Men don't look at it as anything beyond a social dance and it is very good for leaders or followers to dance with new partners to hone their skills.
· Please, if you are out and there is an available man, ask him to dance, you won't regret it.
· I usually ask the ladies to dance, but if a lady asks me to dance, I will always accept her invitation. I love to dance and am flattered when someone asks me to dance. Women should ask men to dance - sometimes, a guy gets a little nervous and won't ask.
· I'm just starting out with my dancing lessons and the social dance is quite intimidating since I have no partner to take with me. You have no idea how welcome I'd feel if some woman said to me, 'Would you Cha Cha with me?' or Waltz, or Foxtrot, or whatever dance happened to be playing.
· If the guy (or lady) has a partner, you can always check with the partner first. Far better to ask than not to dance at all! ~ Etta
Dear Etta Kitt
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How can I know my breath isn't offensive?
Etta says - Thank you for your question! Bad breath doesn't have to be a life sentence. You just have to get to the root of the problem. So, here's a list of things you can do to eliminate the causes. As we get older, our army of good intestinal flora shrinks. That's why -- despite careful mouth care -- bad breath can be a big problem among older adults.
1. BOOST YOUR INTESTINAL FLORA - Too much bad bacteria in your gut can affect your breath! Start taking daily probiotics.
2. STOP THE SUGAR - You've also got to limit your sugar intake. Believe it or not, your sugar intake directly affects your breath.
3. WATER, WATER, WATER - Drinking water helps to flush away bad bacteria from your mouth and gut. Try drinking peppermint or ginger tea. Both peppermint and ginger aid in digestion. They also freshen your breath.
4. FRESHEN YOUR DIGESTIVE TRACT - Here's another secret weapon against bad breath: chlorophyll. It's the green pigment found in plants and vegetables. It also helps destroy harmful bacteria in your body.
5. CHOOSE TOOTHPASTE
In closing, remember that you can control bad breath once and for all by getting to the root of the problem. By following these simple steps, you'll do more than just mask your symptoms. You'll correct a digestive problem that's started to take hold.
As an added bonus, you'll feel fresh and clean in your mouth all day long. And you'll definitely have more confidence talking to friends and family. ~Etta
Dear Etta Kitt
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How do I handle unwelcome comments made while dancing ?
Etta says - Thank you for your question! It is important to be a gentleman and a lady at all times. Joking and casual flirting is all a part of dance, just be sure that your jokes, flirtations and comments stay casual and tasteful. It's easy to misunderstand what might have been meant as a silly little flirtatious joke. If you know a person will take a joke lightly, then feel free. Otherwise, smiles and politeness are always winners.
It would be unfortunate to have people avoid wanting to dance with you because you become overbearing. You may have a flirty nature, but until you get to know the person and he/she gets to know you it is important that you not come on too strong. ~Etta
Dear Etta Kitt
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Can the quest to smell good put you on fragrance overload?
Etta says - Thank you for your question! It's important to smell fresh and clean before a dance, attending a party or taking a dance lesson. We have all experienced too much cologne from both men and women. They usually don't know that their attempt to smell good is doing just the opposite. John Bridges, author of "How to be a Gentleman," answers the question in Chapter 2: A Gentleman and His Cologne .
A gentleman considers cologne intimate apparel. It should not cause comment, positive or negative, among other people in the room. Instead, it should be saved as a pleasant surprise. A gentleman understands that cologne is an accessory. It is not to be used as a substitute for deodorant. A dab on either side of his neck is quite enough.
When used to excess, cologne is annoying and raises questions about what smells are being covered up.
Perfume, cologne, and aftershave are lovely when a mere hint of fragrance is apparent. They are ghastly when people are forced to run to open windows after you walk by. ~Etta
Dear Etta Kitt
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Is it appropriate to teach and correct people when dancing with them socially?
Etta says - Good question! The general consensus is that it is not appropriate to 'teach' or to correct people when dancing socially.
It is the leader's responsibility to assess the follower's dance ability and skills at following.
Most dancers say they like to try new things, but it is important that the leader doesn't make the follower feel inadequate by attempting to do steps that are too difficult for the follower's ability level. Neither the leader nor follower should use a social dance to make negative comments about the other person's dancing or try to give them a mini lesson during the dance. The length of a song is 3-4 minutes max. This time should be spent making the dance an enjoyable experience for both partners. If dancing isn't fun, why do it?
There are times when we all ask other dancers to show us a certain move or steps - that is fine as long as both parties are comfortable with that and you can do this without disrupting other dancers on the floor (move over to the side somewhere).
Sometimes when you and your regular partner are dancing together one or the other of you may want to make a comment about a new step or move you are trying or about the other's dancing in general. Keep your comments helpful and constructive and not critical or hurtful and your partner will appreciate it! Always remember to keep dance a fun experience!
If you are dancing with another person for the first time or with someone you seldom dance with, don't use the time to correct and teach. ~Etta